Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Korea by Night



The part with the lights on it is the FREE half of Korea.

Just a reminder.

Monday, July 30, 2012

Weekend's over... time for GREG'S GIGGLES!


Well, that answers THAT question.....


So. It's almost August. If you were in Europe, you'd be starting your vacation now.... but you're not, sooooo.......


Ladies 'n' germs, MR. GREG SCHANKIN!

*        Commander Daniel Burbank shook hands with a robot on the international space station. It's all part of NASA's "What stupid stuff can we do in zero gravity" program.

*        President Obama will be going to Disney World where he'll unveil his new plan to create jobs. And what better place for the president to talk about his jobs plan than Fantasyland?

*     Energy Secretary Stephen Chu testified before Congress that he thought it was a good idea to lend $535 million of our tax dollars to the solar panel company Solyndra right before they went bankrupt. If he'd taken all of that money, put it in a big pile and set it on fire, it would have produced more energy than Solyndra.

*     President Obama's top economic adviser, a man named Austan Goolsbee, has stepped down: He will be replaced by something a little more effective: a Magic 8-ball.

*        A report from the Department of Homeland Security says they regularly monitor social networking sites, like Facebook, Twitter and MySpace. So that's who is looking at MySpace, I guess.

*     Hey, what's the difference between Obama and Dr. Conrad Murray? Conrad Murray will still be serving a term next year.

*     Just saw “Rise of the Planet of the Apes” on DVD. In this one, not only do the apes take over, but they actually do a better job with the debt crisis than humans.

*        If I make a resolution, I'm not going to do it. I don't like anyone telling me what to do. Even if it's me telling me what to do. So I end up breaking resolutions because I like to rebel against myself.

*     People say that Mrs. Obama may have been drunk at an appearance. Well, take a look at those poll numbers. I'd be drunk too.

*     I wish our election was more like the election in France. By that, I mean I wish it was over.

*     You can always tell Simon Cowell is coming back to TV when there’s a shortage of black T-shirts at Babies “R” Us.

*     The concept of the big summer blockbuster didn't exist until "Jaws" in 1975. I'm surprised no one's combined "Jaws" with a fairy tale — "Snow White and the Seven Sharks."

*        Dutch scientists say the world's first test-tube meat, a hamburger made from cow stem cells, will be available sometime this year. Test tube meat made from stem cells. I hope it tastes as good as it sounds.

*     The American Airlines terminal at JFK was evacuated recently because of a suspicious bag. Although with American Airlines, any bag that ends up in the right place qualifies as “suspicious.”

*     Steven Spielberg is going to release a biopic about Abraham Lincoln next year. Right, that’s a good way to honor Lincoln — by sending people to the theater.

*     There are 249 millionaires in Congress. Remember a couple of years ago when this new Congress told us they had the solution to the recession? Apparently, they didn't share it with the rest of us.

*        From 1934 to 1963, the biggest criminals in America ended up on Alcatraz. Nowadays they end up on Wall Street or in government.

*        Newt Gingrich says that people who ride on subways in New York are the elite. I was on the subway last time I was there and one of the elites sitting next to me was smoking crack. (Of course, that would explain a lot.)

*        The movie “Big Miracle” came out, about some people trying to save a group of whales. Of course you may be familiar with the TV version — “The Biggest Loser.”

*     Scientists are using a robot explorer at the pyramids in Egypt to photograph secret chambers that humans haven’t seen in 4,500 years. There’s graffiti down there that hasn’t been translated yet. It probably says, “Larry King was here."

*     Cinco de Mayo celebrates the Mexican army’s unlikely victory over the French. Not to rain on anyone’s parade, but is any victory over the French unlikely?

*     Welcome to Detroit, where there’s something happening every minute and most of it goes unprosecuted.

*        A new study found that birth control pills don’t cause weight gain. But you know what does cause weight gain? Not taking birth control pills....

*     Live every day as if it were your last. Eventually you will be right!

Ththththtat's all folks!

Monday, July 23, 2012

Capt Haddock's Curse Page!
- The Challenge



Okay, everyone, I hear you.

I'm getting complaints from some of my readers about having to google or hit dictionary.com at some of my more obscure (not to mention obscene) vocabulary.

I admit that it's a bad habit of mine--too much lawyering, probably.

But as well acquainted as I am with scatological denigration, even I run up against a vocabularistic sesquipedelianism that even I can't handle. As I found recently.  Are you up to the challenge, then?

Here's one for you then....

Once upon a time (1929-1983), there was a comic-book series called The Adventures of Tin-Tin. Its creator, the Belgian children's book-writer Herge', found himself with a problem: one of his fans' favorite characters was a sea-captain, the immortal Captain Archibald Haddock, who would accompany the hero Tin-Tin on their many adventures.

But how do we get around the problem that this is a children's book? What kind of language would a sea-captain use?

Well, this were children's books, after all. So instead of the usual four-letterisms that one encounters so commonly in rap music these days, Herge fell back on, um, obscurely long words without common meanings....

....like the following.

I'm sure your reaction to these, er, curses is the same as mine: "WTF, over?"

Anyway, read them over.... check your vocabulary at the door. (There's a link at the bottom that defines the batch.)

Ready.... set.... commence!


Abecedarian Hydrocarbon
Aborigine Iconoclast
Anachronism Invertebrate
Anacoluthon Jobbernowl
Antediluvian Kleptomaniac
Anthracite Macrocephalic
Anthropithecus Mameluke
Anthropophagus Migou
Aztec Moujik
Bashi-bazouks Mountebank
Belemnite Nyctalops
Brontosaurus Odd-toed ungulate
Cachinnatin Ophicleide
Carpathian Pachyrhizus
Cercopithecus Patagonian
Coelacanth Phylloxera
Colocynth Picaroon
Corsair Pithecanthropus
Cro-magnon Punchinello
Diplodocus Quadruped
Dipsomaniac Rapscallion
Doryphoros Rhizopod
Ectoplasms Ruminant
Ethelred Sea-gherkin
Fatima Slubberdegullion
Filibuster Vivisectionist
Guano-gatherer Weecil
Harlequin Zapotec

How did you do?

I will admit: when I came upon this list, there were WELL OVER HALF of them I couldn't identify or define. That's pretty sorry.

The definitions are found here.

Saturday, July 21, 2012

Nastiest Political Season EVAH?

Snagged from my FB friends Mary Steinmann, via Mary Bredlau:
I have been seeing WAY too much name calling, and it seems to be escalating, from BOTH Democrats and Republicans. In these increasingly frustrating times, it is easy to get emotional or to feel strongly about something. But the moment that you begin to call names, or to swear, your credibility decreases. Just like swearing it is always possible to make your point without name-calling. It just requires some modicum of intelligence to be displayed. And I KNOW that all you guys are the best and the brightest stars in the universe. It also occurred to me that way more name calling goes on on these pages than I have ever seen in a face to face conversation. Why?? Because names hurt. They hurt the person called names, but they also hurt the person calling them. They become the seeds of hate. I have seen posts from friends I treasure in the past few weeks claiming the other party is full of hate.. I believe none of us is.. but the name calling gives a strong impression of hate. So, I am asking you all to consider finding ways to express yourself without using phrases like libtard, zealot, liar or worse. Give it a shot, because I know you all posses sufficient vocabulary to eloquently and intelligently express yourselves. And I believe with ALL my heart that NONE of MY friends are haters. Bonus to this is that if there is no name calling, the other side may actually read all of what you have to say with an open or at least more open mind. Give it a shot.. there is nothing to loose and SO much to gain.. Create a happy day!!
I know that sometimes I write with a broad brush....and occasionally use ridicule to powerful effect. I've hurt feelings, sometimes of the people I love dearly. Nevertheless, politics is the art of clashing wills, and this never happens without hurt feelings. It's an old story.....

Friday, July 20, 2012

I Remember When We Had A Space Program....

JULY 20 1969. I WAS 7. NEVER FORGET!

Friday, July 13, 2012

Ratko Mladic Rushed To Hospital....

.....on day two of his trial.

Such a shame.

Suffering from a diseased heart, and at his age, too. So sad.

:-/

Site Pest, please note.

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Welcome to the Total Perspective Vortex


Wednesday, July 11, 2012

REPOST: Before 9/11 there was 7/11
(Dedicated To My Unfavorite Site Pest)


The Srebrenica morgue in Tuzla: the stench of this place haunts me to this day.

NOTE: This was first posted on July 11, 2010. Nothing has changed.

[Seventeen] years ago today there began a orgy of industrially-planned genocide at a little town in western Bosnia known as Srebrenica. At the end of a weeklong period, some 5500 military aged Bosnian male prisoners of war from ages 12 to 85 were deliberately massacred in an act of stone cold state-sponsored genocide. Some 2500 others died unarmed on a battlefield in an act that was technically an act of war (think the Iraqi "Highway of Death" of 1991) but which compounded the slaughter of the prisoners. Together that made about 8000 or so dead, or some 1% of the Bosnian Muslim population of the entire country (2% of its males), the equivalent of 3,000,000 Americans.

Today, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton had this to say about the Srebrenica Massacre:
Today we remember the tragic events in Srebrenica 15 years ago. I join President Obama and the people of the United States in offering our deepest condolences on this most solemn occasion. We honor the memories of the victims and mourn with their families.

The United States stands with Bosnia and Herzegovina, and all countries in the region who wish to foster peace and reconciliation. We remain committed to ensuring that those responsible for these crimes face justice. We recognize that there can be no lasting peace without justice. It is only by bringing all responsible parties to account for their crimes that we will truly honor Srebrenica’s victims.

We are duty-bound – to the victims, to their surviving family members, and to future generations – to prevent such atrocities from happening again. Our common faith in the value of freedom and peace unifies us and drives us to act. That is why we are committed to working with all the communities that make up Bosnia and Herzegovina to move forward and build a pluralistic, democratic state that can take its rightful place in the Euro-Atlantic community. A prosperous, free, and unified Bosnia and Herzegovina is the most worthy monument to those who lost their lives at Srebrenica and the best guarantee against such a tragedy ever repeating itself.

This marks the first time I can say I am in full agreement with Hillary about ANYTHING.

If you have five or ten minutes, please take the time to read Wikipedia's article about the Srebrenica massacre. You may not be glad that you did, but it's the right thing to do.

Srebrenica was where the World, after saying "never again" in 1945, shrugged its collective shoulders and said, "Well, never say never." Christ forgive us.




ADDENDUM:

It is apparent that out there somewhere there is, er, not in full agreement with me on this. My old sitepest has returned and had this to say to enlighten us:

What's this? oh another poor poor Muslim from Bosnia trying to Kill America... what it can't be they want democracy right?


Are you sad that your jihadist bro got caught, you must be so sad, quick contact your financers and Ruder Finn and make sure that the mass media doesn't get a hold of this... you must be devastated to know a brother in arms will be in jail for a long time. poor you. poor sarajevo.


http://blogs.voanews.com/breaking-news/2012/05/01/jury-convicts-bosnia-born-muslim-in-plot-to-bomb-new-york-subway-2/


Jury Convicts Bosnia-Born Muslim in Plot to Bomb New York Subway


Posted Tuesday, May 1st, 2012 at 6:55 pm A federal jury has convicted a Bosnian-born man of attempting to bomb New York City's subway in 2009 for al-Qaida. Adis Medunjanin faces life in prison when he is sentenced on September 7. The jury found him guilty of nine counts of terrorism, including plotting to kill American soldiers in Afghanistan and consorting with al-Qaida. Medunjanin's attorneys told the court that he backed out of the plot to set off bombs in the country's busiest subway system. They admit he traveled to Pakistan to join the Taliban, but said he had no intention to cause death and destruction in New York. But federal prosecutors argued that Medunjanin and two co-defendants trained at an al-Qaida camp where they were asked to carry out a suicide bombing in the United States. Other targets they looked at included the New York Stock Exchange, Grand Central Terminal, and Times Square. The two other defendants have already pled guilty and are cooperating with the government awaiting sentence.


AND....


oh what happened? you won't share the news about your poor poor Bosnian Muslims that were just fighting for human rights? you sold your soul to the devil for a few jihadist dollars how does it feel/


AND....


blah blah blah jihadist you chose your side you chose nazi croatia and jihadist bosnia, 40,000 mujahadeen fighters from pakistan iran and saudi arabia and they still couldn't defeat Christianity and the Serbs.


You and Islam lose. You an pretend all you want, we know who you took money from, we are preparing a terrorist case against you.


We know who you are.


AND....


Hey terrorist, you got played by the Jihadist...


http://presstv.com/detail/2012/07/03/249151/nato-behind-muslim-carnage-at-srebrenica/


how does it feel that you have been fighting for Sharia but losing?


From link above: One of the most brutal incidents in recent history is the massacre at Srebrenica in 1995 by a paramilitary group known as "the Scorpions." We now have a top level witness and reams of official documents that categorically prove that it was NATO ordered, not only the Dutch "stand down" that led to the killings, but recruited, paid and controlled the Scorpions as well.


It was the trial of Ratko Mladic that may be the destruction of the ICC or at least should be. As Timothy Blanchford-Henchly points out in the Serbian SOS, "The Ratko Mladic trial at the farcical International Criminal Court - that travesty of justice and insult to international law which kidnaps people, illegally detains them and does not apply the principles of due process - has been interrupted indefinitely after the prosecution "forgot" to deliver thousands of pages of evidence to the defense."


Background


It was this key evidence and this witness, now safely in Belarus that caused the ICC to stop the trial of Ratko Mladic, the "fall guy" documents show was "set up" by the French DRM in 70 communiqués we now hold.


Though, with the breakup of Yugoslavia, the region was left with scores to settle, some between Christians and Muslims, there were other forces at play also. The vast international drug trade had been channeled for decades from the Far East, through processing centers in Turkey and through Yugoslavia. If the "status quo" is any indication of intent, NATO sitting on Kosovo, Bulgaria, Romania and much of the region, a region now a center of drug trafficking, of international crime and a region increasingly fortified to threaten Russia or Syria or Iran, this may well have been the NATO intent when organizing the formation of the Scorpions and ordering the slaughter of thousands of civilians.


During World War II, more Serbs, by percentage, died than any other people, all Christians, most killed in death camps run by Croatians and Italians, some by Catholic priests, all under the direction of Germany. Prior to that, Serbia had been under Ottoman control for hundreds of years, a corrupt empire that misruled not only the Balkans but the entire Middle East as well.



RLK here. Hmn.


Dear site pest: To quote the immortal Kurt Vonnegut:


 "Why don't you take a flying fuck at a rolling donut? Why don't you take a flying fuck at the mooooooon?"

Monday, July 9, 2012

The Boss Isn't Looking. Time for Greg's Giggles!



Ladies 'n' germs, Mr. GREG SCHANKIN!

* Turns out that when they were covering the Supreme Court ruling a couple of weeks ago, CNN got the ruling wrong–they said that the Individual Mandate was unconstitutional, when it turned out it was. CNN executives rejoiced that the audience was too small to notice.

* PETA released a new ad aimed at children, that compares eating Thanksgiving turkeys to eating their pet dogs. Or as Obama put it, "So?"

* After the debt vote, Sen. Chuck Schumer said it's time for jobs to move to the front burner. They're only worried about our jobs when they're about to lose their jobs.

* New York City's Mayor Bloomberg is cracking down on the most dangerous threat to the Big Apple: sodas. Bloomberg wants to outlaw sodas and other sugary drinks over 16 ounces. I try to limit my sugar intake. That's why I eat little fun-size candy bars. But I eat them 50 at a time. By the time I'm done, nobody's having fun. My almond joy turns to almond shame.

* He's so lazy that if there were work in bed, he would rather sleep on the floor.

* President Obama has offered bailout money to keep Greece from defaulting on its loans. When Greece thanked him, Obama said "Don't mention it . . . to China, because it's their money."

* In Las Vegas a diner suffered a heart attack while eating the "Triple Bypass Burger" at a restaurant called the Heart Attack Grill. Even worse, it totally ruined the man's plans to take his date back to his room at the Chlamydia Hilton.

* Monday, President Obama urged his supporters to watch his latest economic speech. Though legally he was forced to add, 'But not while operating heavy machinery.'

* A lot of accidents are caused by bikers who don't have a feel for the road, like the dentists, lawyers and accountants that take Harleys out on the weekend.

* "The problem with socialism is that eventually you run out of other people's money." - Margaret Thatcher

* Not one person was murdered in El Salvador last Saturday in what was the first homicide-free day in nearly three years. The bad news: 50 people got killed during the celebration.

* Historians say the first exchange of Valentine's Day cards in America was in the 1600s. Back then, they said "Be my valentine or I'll have you burned for witchcraft."

* The original Avenger comic book has a superhero called Ant-Man. They didn't put him in the movie. But Ant-Man would have been awesome. He could solve any problem, right any wrong, provided it took place at a picnic.

* Dick Cheney was grilled by the women of "The View." So apparently he's willing to undergo torture himself to prove a point.

* In Japan, they have developed a new green machine that turns regular paper into toilet paper. Kind of like what Wall Street did with the dollar.

* In North Korea, they announced they're going to embalm Kim Jong Il's body and put it on display just like Russia did with Lenin and America did with Larry King.

* Political analysts say that Oprah Winfrey can help deliver to Obama the white, middle-class female vote. They also say Dr. Phil could deliver the fake doctor vote.

* Justin Bieber was in a car crash. He can drive? Bieber is fine, but his Ferrari — wait, he has a Ferrari? Bieber's Ferrari was wrecked. The police described the scene as "adorable."

* John McCain was tough. A couple years ago he was called to vote on making Woodstock a national monument, and his comment to Senator Clinton was: "I am sorry I couldn't make the concert, but I was tied up that weekend."

* After saying the jobs bill is paid for, President Obama now says that it will be paid for by raising taxes over 10 years. I can't figure out if he's the kind of guy who makes infomercials, or the kind of guy who falls for infomercial.

* Georgia passed a new measure that requires adults in pickup trucks to wear a seatbelt. Not only that, they also have to use a cup holder for their beer.

* The president of Iran, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, has called President Obama a big bully. When you're 5 feet 2 inches tall, everyone seems like a bully.

* WalMart is now considering selling wine from vending machines. As a precaution, the machine requires that you swipe your drivers license first. If you're buying wine from a vending machine, what are the odds you still have a drivers license?

Thththththat's all folks.....

Wednesday, July 4, 2012

The True Spirit Of The Holiday.

Independence Day


A rerun from three years ago, but still cool.



I admit I am very fond of the John Adams miniseries.... and of John Adams himself, ... even if he was obnoxious and disliked.

Monday, July 2, 2012

Heigh ho, heigh ho.... time for GREG'S GIGGLES!



Ladies 'n' germs, Mr. Greg SCHANKIN!

*     On the campaign trail, Ron Paul said he did not like his milk homogenized. After this, Romney said, “I am also not a fan of gay milk.”

*     Washington, D.C. is updating its traffic cameras to enforce traffic laws. How about enforcing bribery and corruption laws?

*     The World Economic Forum, which ranks economies, moved the United States down to 5th place. But we’re still the fattest, so that’s good. (Switzerland came in 1st place. I guess those little army knives are selling like crazy....)

*     Many voters feel that Mitt Romney is out of touch with real Americans after he tried to make a bet with Obama for $10,000. When asked to comment, Mitt said, “I'm sorry, but that's all I had in my pocket at the time.”

*     The New York Mets are planning to move the walls of Citi Field in order to increase the number of homeruns they hit. Call me old fashioned but isn't that what steroids are for?

*     In the upcoming special on BinLaden's death, Hillary Clinton said that watching the raid on Osama bin Laden’s compound was “38 of the most intense minutes.” Which can only mean one thing: she's never had to assemble a chair from Ikea.

*     Authorities have discovered what they call the most sophisticated tunnel ever found underneath the U.S.-Mexican border, being built by a Mexican drug cartel. And Gov. Rick Perry asked the question we're all asking: “Why can't these tunnels be dug by hard-working American drug cartels?”

*     The Israeli army is planning to give its soldiers special new socks that can be worn for two weeks straight without smelling. In other words, they created the socks my college roommate thought he had.

*     Here's how I know that we had quite a few trick-or-treaters last hallowe'en.... the barbed wire was covered with ripped costumes.

*     The liberals are asking us to give Obama time. We agree...and think 25 to life would be appropriate.

*     Police in Kentucky arrested a naked man covered in chocolate and peanut butter after he broke into a grocery store. So I guess there is a wrong way to eat a Reese's.

*     This is interesting. Over 100,000 people have listed themselves as organ donors since Facebook made it an option last week. Which is weird 'cause I've always turned to eBay for all my organ needs..

*     I heard that the US lost its AAA rating. Why doesn’t the auto club mind their own business?

*        Spirit Airlines announced it’s going to install non-reclining seats in their airplanes. They came up with this last month after they saw a passenger that looked comfortable.  These are the same people that are charging $45 for a carry-on bag. Maybe Spirit Airlines should change their name to “Mean-Spirited Airlines.”

*     Mitt Romney is calling Obama’s bus tour the “Magical Misery Tour,” which is kind of funny coming from a member of the Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hair Club for Men.

*     The difference between being a small businessman and an employee is that when you run your business and you are on layoff you STILL have to go into work. (<<-----AMEN, GREG! - rlk)

*        A 99-year-old guy and his 96-year-old wife getting divorced. They never got along and people kept saying, “Why did you wait so long to get a divorce?” And they said, “We want to wait until the kids were dead.”

*     The 4th of July is the day we celebrate our independence from Simon Cowell.

*     The economy is so bad, Bill Gates had to switch to dial up.

*     A new survey found that a third of Americans would not be able to pass the U.S. citizenship test. It's a real insult to our Founding Fathers — Denzel Washington and George Jefferson.

*     Mark Zuckerberg personally made $1.5 billion the day of Facebooks' IPO. That is more than I make in a year.

*        A student at the University of Wisconsin in Madison spent 90 days technology free. He went without a cell phone, Facebook, Twitter, or any social media of any kind. And you know what really improved? His driving! And his sex life. (In real life you don’t have to settle for 2D.)

*     Congress just lifted a ban on producing and exporting horse meat. Or as Taco Bell put it, “There was a ban on that?”

*        The defense department is trying to find out who leaked information to filmmakers making a movie about the killing of Osama bin Laden. Even worse, the name of the movie is “Harold and Kumar Kill Osama."

*     They say we avoided economic disaster. So now we’re $16 trillion in debt. That’s not “economic disaster?”

Thththththtat's alll, folks.....

Sunday, July 1, 2012

WTF????? (Or: Adventures in Inappropriate Advertising)

The following is from the following link:

http://wireupdate.com/florida-teen-kills-self-during-game-of-russian-roulette.html

I shittest thou not.