Friday, January 6, 2012

It's Friday. Rich is Too Busy to Post.
Time for....Greg's Giggles!



That's the CN Tower in Toronto in the background.


With your host, Greg Schankin!

* If they're serious about cutting back on spending, how about not holding these G/20 summits in the world's most expensive places like the South of France? What's wrong with the function room at Denny’s or the Waffle House?

* President Obama says his new jobs bill will create over 1.9 million jobs — and up to 50 of them will be right here in America.

* Today is the Feast of the Epiphany, where we celebrate the arrival of the three kings to Bethlehem. This happened in Bethlehem because you can't find a virgin or three wise men in Washington.

* Don't worry about if people like you, the most important thing in life is: DO YOU LIKE YOU? If the answer is yes, congratulations, if the answer is no, take a long hard look at why you feel that way. If you don't like you, it's likely the folks around you don't either. Fix YOU and you will find the whole world is a better place.

* The Toronto Zoo is planning to split up a pair of gay penguins. You know how they're going to split them up? By giving the penguins just one ticket to see “Mamma Mia.”

* Sources are reporting that Ryan Seacrest is being considered as a replacement for Matt Lauer. Earlier this month, he was informed there was a show on TV that he doesn't host and he became very angry. How many jobs can a person do? Forget Wall Street. These protesters should be occupying Ryan Seacrest.

* Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.

* According to the latest poll, a record 73 percent of Americans think the country is headed in the wrong direction. But the good news: Gas is so expensive that we’ll never get there.

* Rupert Murdoch said that he was embarrassed and that testifying before parliament was the most humbling day in his life. That’s mostly because he spends every other day swimming in a bathtub full of money like Scrooge McDuck.

* Iran is now in possession of an American drone. When I heard that I thought, "Oh, my god, they captured Joe Biden?"

* The final 'Harry Potter' movie made a record-breaking $476 million worldwide. Yeah, 'Harry Potter' made so much money that weekend, President Obama just asked him for a loan.

* Ron Paul. America's simple, easy to understand wrong answer.

* Our national credit rating was downgraded and it caused a nosedive on Wall Street. If I had any understanding of any of this, I’d be very nervous right now, but fortunately I don’t.

* The White House held its annual Hanukkah celebration. It was a traditional Jewish ceremony, except for the part where it was hosted by a black man from Hawaii.

* In a new interview, President Obama said Ben Franklin is the Founding Father he would most like to meet. Meanwhile, Joe Biden said that Panthro is the ThunderCat he would most like to meet.

* We owe China more than a trillion dollars. Why don’t we just give them Puerto Rico ? (A: We already gave them Hong Kong!)

* The Egyptian military is asking people who they want to be the next president by using a Facebook poll. So congratulations to Egypt’s new leader, President Betty White.

* Barack Obama has reportedly started holding a weekly séance in the Oval Office. So far, he has only managed to channel Jimmy Carter.

* The government is just a few days from running out of money to pay their bills. The latest plan is to see how much cash they can get for John McCain on “Antiques Roadshow.”

* According to reports, one of Moammar Gadhafi’s sons had an elaborate plan to sneak into Mexico. Authorities broke up the plan before it took place. Believe me, if there's one thing Mexico will not stand for, it’s people sneaking over their border.

* It sez here that a woman rubbed her tochis on a modern art painting. Looking at the painting I'm not sure how, or even if, she damaged it.....

* Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance!

No comments:

Post a Comment

Keep it clean for gene.