Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Dick Cheney's on a book tour

....so we decided to revive this little gem.

Have a nice morning.




I love Dick Cheney. He went hunting with the only Republican trial lawyer in existence... and shot him.

Monday, August 29, 2011

Greg's Giggles for August 29

...so that your Monday doesn't entirely suck.

Ladies and germs, Mr. Greg Schankin!


* A company in Seattle is coming out with a medical marijuana patch for dogs and cats. So finally, dogs and cats won’t have to buy their weed illegally.

* To give you an idea of how bad our credit is, if Obama wants to take another loan from China, his mother-in-law has to cosign.

* Love thy neighbor, but don't brag about it

* At the first Republican presidential debate, seven candidates got together to agree on how much they dislike the government they would like to run.

* Ganesh -- now there's a Hindu god a good Republican can get behind.

* I once quit dating a girl when I found out she was a member of the Fibonacci Party. They're mean and extreme.

* "Forgiveness is the fragrance the flower leaves on the heel of the one who crushed it." -David Jeremiah

* Father’s Day was last Sunday, it is a day on which fathers across country are reminded through crappy gifts of how much more their children love mommy.

* Michele Bachmann wished Elvis Presley a happy birthday even though it’s actually the anniversary of his death. When told about the mistake, Bachmann said, “My apologies to Elvis, and the entire Costello family.”

* Could you drive any better if I shoved that cell phone up your ASS?

* The company that makes the BlackBerry is laying off 11 percent of its workforce. You can tell it's bad, because the CEO's announcement ended with the line “Sent from my iPhone.”

* Nancy Pelosi has named the final members of the committee charged with reducing the debt. Unfortunately, the committee includes MC Hammer, Willie Nelson, and Nicholas Cage.

* You all know Bristol Palin has a book. She reveals that she lost her virginity on a camping trip. Bristol said she named her son “Tripp” because “camping” seemed like a dumb name.

* When a man steals your wife there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

* The new manager of the Florida Marlins is 80 years old. This makes him the oldest man working in baseball and the youngest man working in Florida.

* A new study says that swearing doesn’t make you feel better, but you know who disagrees with that? Anyone that has ever stubbed their toe.

* This year, Arnold Schwarzenegger gets an extra gift for Father’s Day.

* According to the Wall Street Journal, economic experts now fear there may be a second recession. A second recession? When did the first one end?

* President Obama’s new slogan is: 'I Thought We Could, but It Turns Out the Other Guys Are Assholes.'

* China's mad at President Obama for meeting with the Dalai Lama, but come on. Obama doesn't owe them anything — except like $14 trillion.

* President Obama announced this week that he is going to start sending out his own messages personally on Twitter. And today Anthony Weiner said, “It’s a trap, don’t do it!” But President Obama’s tweets are a little different than Anthony Weiner’s. When Obama sends out pictures of something obscene, it’s the unemployment numbers.

* Prince William and his wife Kate have posted an ad for a housekeeper. When he heard this, Arnold Schwarzenegger said, “So it looks like they do want to start a family.”

* President Obama celebrated his 50th birthday in his hometown of Chicago. Oprah jumped out of the cake. Then she jumped back in. She loves cake.

* The economy is so bad that bedbugs are now infesting sleeping bags and tents, because they can't afford to stay in hotels anymore.

* There ought to be one day-- just one-- when there is open season on senators. Will Rogers

* Officials still can’t say what happened to $6.6 billion that was sent to Iraq for reconstruction. That’s money we could have wasted and mismanaged right here at home.

* The White House says that the unemployment rate is good news because it means more people are looking for jobs. More good news like that, and everyone at the White House will be looking for jobs.

* If you get married, have children, grow old and die... does that mean that if you never get married the rest won't happen?

* Alcohol and calculus don't mix. Never drink and derive.

* ...and never go on the information superhighway after a couple of drinks.


* I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't seem to get my head that far up your ass.

* Arnold Schwarzenegger’s maid said when her son was told that Schwarzenegger was his father he said “cool.” It was a big improvement. Up to this point, the kid thought his father was Jean-Claude Van Damme.

* I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't seem to get my head that far up your ass.

* I don't approve of political jokes...I've seen too many of them get elected.

* Snooki from “Jersey Shore” has broken up with her boyfriend of eight months. If that drunken little tangerine angel can’t find love, what hope is there for the rest of us?

* Regular naps prevent old age, especially if you take them while driving.

* Happy birthday to Donald Trump. For his birthday party, they’ll play “Pin everything on Obama.”

* Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem.Maybe you should get rid of the body before you do the wash....

Until next time... that's Greg's Giggles.

Friday, August 26, 2011

Quote for the Day

Almost everything: all external expectations, all pride all fear of embarrassment or failure. These things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose.

~Steve Jobs
Stanford Commencement Adress, 2005
US computer engineer & industrialist (1955 - )


Tuesday, August 23, 2011

REPOST: How $1 = 1 Cent

Today (more or less) marks 2.5 years since I started this blog.

Yaaay for me.

(In recognition whereof I'd like to rerun this little essay which first ran in June 2009. As an old time coin geek I've always liked it.... even if I don't like the truth it represents.)


===

A TALE OF TWO PENNIES - JUNE 16, 2009



[Executive Summary: This is the first of an irregular series of essays about the United States Dollar--what it really is, and what the boys in Washington are doing with it and will do with it.]

This is a story about two coins.

It is also a story about my future and yours.

Let's start with the coin pictured above. That's a penny--i.e, a U.S. one cent coin. A rather battered 1839 "Large Cent, Coronet Type," according to R.S. Yeoman, the godfather of American coin collecting. The last "Large Cent" was made in 1856; starting in 1859 the Small Cent (present sized) replaced it--an eagle design for a couple of years, followed by the familiar "Indian Head".

This coin is in "Good" condition, as a coin collector would term it; it's in "crappy" condition, as you or I would say.

I got it at a coin shop this week for $5.00, pulling it out of a grab bag.

Let's look at the back:



Very simple: a wreath, UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, and ONE CENT.

Back in the old days, and I mean the OLD days, they used to produce "pennies" that actually contained about 1 cent (as valued then) in copper. They were about double the size of a present day penny, and about 3x present day weight. (Today's pennies, which are now made of zinc, are now very light and only weigh about 80% what pennies did ten years ago.)

Now, let's look at this shiny NEW coin that the Federal Government is now releasing.



This is one of the new Presidential dollar coins--this particular one memorializes the general (some say war criminal) William Henry Harrison, known for his victory at the Battle of Tippicanoe... and for the fact that he died of pneumonia after spending only a month as President. He was elected President in 1840, the year following the minting of the penny above.

Let's now look at the back:



Admittedly not a great pic, but you get the idea: Statue of Liberty, UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, $1.

Now let's compare the two coins directly.



They're almost identical in size and weight.

And one more fact:

Compared to $1 of 1839 money (when the dollar was still backed by gold* and was worth $20.67 for an ounce of gold) the 1839 penny shown here had a buying power of about 25 cents in present day money.... or, in comparison to the present price of gold at $940.00 per ounce this instant... the 1839 penny was worth, today, about $0.445.

[Note: This was 2009 prices. With gold at $1880.00, the 1839 penny would now be worth about 89 cents!]

Now, what's the point of all this?

First, note that in this entire essay (until now) I never used the "cent" symbol of ¢ because it's no longer on my keyboard. Why? Two reasons: First, it used to be found over the number 6, where it has been replaced by a ^ carat symbol--largely because a cent ¢ is of so little value people don't generally even think in terms of 'cents' any more. You never see it at a grocery store, even; they use the "$.00" format. Even in pop culture, the term is corrupted (like the rap star known as "50 Cent", who doesn't even bother to use a plural).

Furthermore, about twenty years ago you first started seeing (Lincoln) pennies in little boxes at the store: "Take-a-penny-leave-a-penny." Today it's not at all uncommon to see nickels and dimes in the same pots. People largely don't bother with it any more. Only the quarter, it seems, is still taken seriously for any commercial purpose.

But more importantly, given the present inflated state of the dollar--which stands about $26.50 being needed to buy what $1.00 did in 1913--shoud the dollar undergo another period of heavy inflation (say, 40% inflation for two or three years) the buying power of the dollar and the original buying power of the penny shall be about the same.*

And so, guess what? The U.S. will finally have brought back the Large Cent.

Not by that name, of course.

ADDENDUM 8/23/2011: Once gold hits $2067.00/oz, we're there. Have a nice day.

Sunday, August 21, 2011

A Litany For Internet Thugs

They said that 21st Century America doesn't have a prayer.

Now it does.

From faceless Facebook admin drones, spare us O Lord.
From tweeting Twitter idiots, spare us O Lord.
From from heart-hardened spammers, spare us O Lord.
From liberal nut-case smear-blogging hacks, spare us O Lord.*
From thread-dominating combox trolls, spare us, O Lord.
From sophomoric drive-by commentators, spare us, O Lord.
....From our own stupidity, Lord save us.


More at Fr. Z's Blog.

*Charles Johnson? This prayer's for you.

Who for President?

A blogger called Mr. Conservative posted a poll on the current Presidential field based on the presence of Rick Perry, Texas governor, who was not involved in last week's Ames straw poll in Iowa. The results read:


Michele Bachmann 2044 15.35%
Ron Paul 2675 20.09%
Rick Perry 5436 40.82%
Rick Santorum 627 4.71%
Herman Cain 1382 10.38%
Mitt Romney 791 5.94%
Newt Gingrich 234 1.76%
Jon Huntsman 44 0.33%
Thad McCotter 83 0.62%

Total 13316 100% (rounding errors may apply)


So. Of these, who's my pick?

Well, any of them would be better than the current resident of the White House, but that's not saying much.

But.

I'll tell you who my pick isn't.

It's not Bachmann, McCotter, Huntsman, or (((shudder))) Ron Paul. All are Representatives and no MC has won the nomination AND the Presidency in over 130 years. (I think the last one was Grover Cleveland, but I could be mistaken.) Nobody is experienced enough in the bunch. Also: Bachmann is a Sarah Palin standin, and as for the Ron Paul Reizanution, the less said, the better.

It's not Newt Gingrich. His hour passed four years ago. (Actually it passed when he helped Clinton off the adultery hook in '98.)

It's not Mitt Romney. It's not merely 'Romneycare', although that is an albatross around his neck. It's just that I don't think a Mormon can be elected President. I'm not anti-Mormon; I just think no Mormon can be President any more than a practicing, actual* Catholic can be President, the gays and the abortionists will not tolerate it and 'something' would happen to prevent it. (JFK was a fluke not likely to be repeated in our lifetime.)

Herman Cain? Interesting as a lightning rod, i.e., loudmouth, but it is not possible for a non-politician to be elected a President, unless he's a victorious four star general. Let him get elected to office first as Senator. And while I wish him generally well, the only reason he's taken seriously in the field is that he's a black Republican. We need more black Republicans--but black Republicans in the field who are elected officials, not pizza venders.

Rick Santorum? Maybe if he were still Senator. He lost his slot and as such became a minor leaguer.

And Rick Perry?

Hmn.

He's a governor. Hence experience. Good enough as far as it goes. He's conservative enough for my taste, generally speaking. I'm not bothered about the so called death penalty charge ("Killer Perry") against him; as governor he has no power whatsoever to prevent death penalties from going forward, so he can't be blamed one way or another for that.

But he made a blunder last year–he made remarks that made him sound like he thought secession was possible, even desireable. And that is something that he needs to correct before I'll take him the least bit seriously.

That only leaves one, the Elephant in the Living Room, who is not in the poll above.

And more about her shortly [if I can get the time].

*by which I mean any Catholic who does not support abortion.


Friday, August 19, 2011

27 Strings of Heaven

Someone has invented a 27 string guitar/harp/mandolin. Purely awesome.

Unfortunately, I can't imbed the vid, so you'll have to >>>>click here.<<<<

AMENDERINO!

YES WE CAN! (to coin a phrase).

The artist is Keith Medley and the song is "Ancestors." His website is >>>>here<<<<.

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Welcome Back, Carter!



Ouch. Ouch. Ouch. BAM! Ouch!

From the London Natural History Museum (supposably)


Monday, August 15, 2011

Economics 101: The Basics

Basic laws of economics:

1. Often people can't afford mortgages for good reason, so respect that reason and don't give them one if they indeed can't afford it.

2. If things can't go on forever, they won't.

3. TANSTAAFL (There Ain't No Such Thing As A Free Lunch).

4. We're painfullly aware that the dollar is made of thin air; don't rub our nose in that fact or we'll start behaving accordingly.

5. Cell phones and very large flat screen TVs are not a civil right and don't tell us they are.

‎6. Credit cards and equity lines-of-credit are how the consumer becomes the consumed.

7. "Mink stole, $5000.00. A large diamond ring, $3000.00. A perfect and romantic dinner for two, $350.00. Forgoing all this unnecessary bullshit and watching a video at home on your anniversary and keeping your credit card balance at zero: PRICELESS."

8. If you're not underwater you are either blessedly fortunate or a renter.

9. A paycheck that clears the bank on a regular basis is a very good thing.

And 10. TANSTAAFL. (I know I used that one before. I say it again.)

‎11. Borrowing from the Chinese is a good idea, if the Chinese are a capitalist country and your most important mutual trading part and primary military ally. If these are not so you may wish to reconsider.

12. Making a guy who can't handle his own taxes Treasury secretary may not be a really good idea.

13. You can adopt policies that discourage people from reproducing themselves, but if you do throwing out the resulting foreign born workforce may qualify as mindbogglingly stupid.

14. When you start seeing legal professionals on freeway ramps holding up signs reading "WILL LITIGATE FOR FOOD" you probably have entered a double dip recession.

And 15. TANSTAAFL.

‎16. Just because it was mentioned in some context of an Ayn Rand novel doesn't means it makes the remotest bit of sense. (A lady who had herself buried in a coffin with a dollar sign on it instead of a cross had SERIOUSLY frakked-up priorities.)

17. The amount of extracted gold on the planet doubled since 1900. In that same period, the world population increased 7x. This is why a gold based currency is so bone-in-the-nose primitive that it should not be considered by grownups. (And don't even get me started about a gold-and-silver bimetallist approach, which is even stupider.)

18. Eventually, if you want your government to give you stuff someone else will have to pay for it. Sooner or later.

19. Taxation is theft with diplomatic immunity and should only be engaged in for life-and-death purposes.

20. TANST...well, you know.

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Happy V-J Day. AKA "Peace Day."


William J. Kent, July 1943

Today is indeed "Peace Day" AKA "V-J Day", the day the combined armed might of the United States and the United Nations (the formal name of our alliance at the time) put an end to Japanese aggression in the Pacific and brought a final end to the horror of the Second World War.

Let us remember our parents and grandparents who gave their lives, blood and time to bring us 2/3 of a century of relative peace.

Thanks, Dad. Uncle Tom Kent. Uncle John Paul Kent. Uncle Bill Remski. Uncle Pat O'Brien. Uncle Pat Cassidy. And Uncle Jack Hammang, whose brother Daniel died for us on Guadalcanal.

And also: Judge Calvin Rock, Judge Harold M. Ryan, and William C. Butler, Esq.

All of whom are now gone, alas.

Saturday, August 13, 2011

REAL Hope & Change.



With thanks to Sam Adams. (Not the brewer.)

Friday, August 12, 2011

You May Be A Geek If.....

Comedian Jeff Foxworthy immortalized himself by coming up with his famous list of Things About You that May Indicate That You Are a Redneck ("If you ever had to climb a watertower with a scrub brush and a can of turpentine to defend your sister's honor.... you may be a redneck.... if you have a running tab at your local taxidermy.... you may be a redneck.... " etc.)

Well, I don't know nothing from rednecks. But in recognition of my cousin Eileen Y.'s declaration that this is Geek Week, and being an expert on the subject, I've come up with a list of signs that may indicate that You May be A Geek.

If you know how to use a c:\ prompt in DOS more efficiently than your GUI....

.... if you know the names of all the redshirts who ever died on Classic Trek and know the combination of Captain Kirk's personal safe....

.... if you know both Mr. Spock's blood type AND the name of Mr. Data's evil twin....

You May Be A Geek.

If you spent more money on table top games when you were single than you did on dating....

.... if you still spend more money on table top games than on your spouse now that you're married....

.... if you don't even have a spouse at all and therefore spend ALL your money on table top games....

You May Be A Geek.

If you know the nationality of the individual who farted in the general direction of King Arthur....

.... if you make obscure references to MAGIC THE GATHERING cards in the course of conversation and everyone within earshot chuckles....

.... if you know what Professor Bernardo de la Paz, Col. Richard Baslim, 1LT Juan Rico, Valentine Michael Smith, and Lazarus Long all have in common....

.... if a major topic of conversation is the comparison of the captaining skills of Kirk vs. Adama vs. Picard....

.... if you know the names of every member of Griffindor House for the class of 1992....

.... if you debate whether you'd prefer your man in black to climb the Cliffs of Insanity on your behalf or to walk around with one of those flashy things....

.... if you have in your possession, even hidden, any plastic figurine portraying any character from a Steven Spielberg or George Lucas movie....

You May Be A Geek.

If you prefer reading graphic novels back to front....

.... if you know what 'tsundere' or 'lolicon' mean....

.... if you can read imported Pokemon cards in the original Japanese....

.... if you have seen at least two versions of film parodies built around the Tro-lo-lo-lo guy and still think they're funny....

.... if you have ever made an active contribution to the Jargon List....

.... if your car has a bumper sticker that reads 'My other car is in orbit around Jupiter' ....

.... if you agree that serenity is a firefly you can really get into....

You May Be A Geek.

If you warn your bickering children not to make you roll for initiative....

.... if the fuzzy dice hanging from your rear view mirror have more than the standard six sides....

.... if you wonder why they don't build cities in a hexagonal grid. pattern....

.... if you think of the Lord of Darkness and Evil as either 'Asmodeus' or 'Morgoth' instead of 'Lucifer'....

You May Be A Geek.

If you regularly write using Boolean logic and multiple nested parentheses ((like this) and/or (this)) in emails to members of your family....

.... if your answer to the question "would you like milk or sugar in your coffee" is "yes"....

.... if you solved Fermat's Last Theorem in high school....

.... if you ever wrote "Old McDonald's Last Theorem (ei - ei = 0)" on a bathroom stall, ....

You May Be A Geek.

I should add: this therefore qualifies as a Geek Week tweak. (Making bad puns or rhyming, plus having the overwhelming urge to say "'No more rhyming, I mean it!" in response to the latter, may also make you a geek. Bonus points if you ask if anyone would like to have a peanut.)

PS. This is an "or" test, not an "and" test, so if you qualify on ANY of the listed grounds you may be a geek. Actually, three or more and it's dead certain.

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

LGF: Someone Mistaken for Fjordman! That's Bad!

From a post on Saturday on LGF:
The identity of Fjordman has been revealed. He revealed it himself, realising that media would sooner or later figure out who he is. Personally, I don’t find his identity all that interesting, but it is a good thing that we now know. Just yesterday, someone else was “exposed” as being Fjordman on wikipedia, and in journalist circles in Norway, there’s been several rumours.

So it was another Peder Jensen after all? Amazing. Art imitates life. Heh.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

The greatest fantasy flick ever made, bar none.



(Forgive me, Mr. Jackson; but yours are #s 2-4.)

Monday, August 8, 2011

"Hold on to 61 as long as you caaaan....."



"...changes come around real soon make us loony old men."

Aging. sucks.

Saturday, August 6, 2011

"This place has got everything!"

Friday, August 5, 2011

I'm impressed....

...with my attorney, Bernie....

Dave Frishberg. Smart man.

Little Green Football "Outs" Fjordman.....

...and reveals his "real name."

Peder Jensen.

So I wrote Charles Johnson.

[Dear Charles:]

That's not Peder Jensen.

That's ANOTHER GUY named Peder Jensen.

Just so you'd know.

Love 'n' kisses,

Richard L. Kent, Esq. (Not Richard Kent)

Greg's Giggles for Friday, August 5

* Saw this sign on a gate up north last weekend: Protected by .357 Magnum 3 days a week. You guess which 3

* Cowboys & Aliens is supposed to be the next big blockbuster. Doesn't that sound like a game Arnold Schwarzenegger would play with his maid?

* You have an inferiority complex and it is fully justified. (Don't worry, everyone else has one too--also fully justified.)

* McDonald’s is planning to open a restaurant every day in China for the next four years. It’s nice — When kids get their Happy Meal toy, they’re like, “Cool! I made this.”

* Is reading in the bathroom considered Multi-Tasking?

* We are $14.3 trillion in debt, but the good news is we’ve got 14.3 trillion airline miles.

* The heat has been good for The Weather Channel. This is like their “Shark Week.”

* A new study found that only 20 percent of high school seniors are proficient in geography. Students weren't really bothered by that number because only 3 percent of them are proficient in math.

* Last night, I got Chinese food and the fortune cookie said, “Where’s my money?”

* The NFL has reached a compromise. The players will make more money, the owners will make more money, and the fans will pay through the nose.

* The debt talks failed again. Now, President Obama wishes he was born in Kenya.

* Casey Anthony was found not guilty. This means that President Obama’s economic team is only the second-most clueless group in America. I think the jury from the O.J. Simpson trial retired and moved to Florida.

* I think we should switch to Celsius. In Europe, it rarely goes over 40 degrees.

* In a new interview, Bill Gates said that Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg is engaged. But when pressed for more info, Gates just froze and had to be rebooted.

* Bookstore company Borders announced that it expects to find a buyer by the end of July. Not a buyer for the company, but just anyone willing to pay them for a book.

* We are $14 trillion in debt. To understand how much money that is, imagine grocery shopping at Whole Foods every day of the month.

* Iowa Congressman Steve King says that if the country falls into default, President Obama could be impeached. Obama could stop that with three words: “President Joe Biden.”

* Glorious silence . . . spend a few minutes every day without conversation, music, or the news. Revel in the pleasure of it.

* A man in Iowa was arrested at his own wedding after he hit another guy who was dancing with his new wife. Yeah, the worst part is, it completely ruined the father-daughter first dance.

* Gay marriage is legal in New York. That's got to drive single women in Manhattan nuts, don't you think? Now all the good men are married AND gay!

* The other day the heat index in Washington, D.C. was 114 degrees. Maybe the world actually did end in May and the people in Washington are actually in hell

* “Cowboys and Aliens” opened last weekend. I wonder what that movie is about.

* Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway!

* Al-Qaida is not what it used to be. You can see they don’t have the money anymore. Instead of 70 virgins, martyrs now get a gift certificate to Olive Garden. (Well, they DO get extra-virgin olive oil with their salad. Does that count?)

* If We Quit Voting Will They All Go Away?

* Save Your Breath ... You'll need it to blow up your date!

* Mitt Romney is so boring, he introduced his own fragrance called 'Unscented.'

* President Obama said he turns 50 this week, but he actually doesn't turn 50 until Aug. 4. This means that even he hasn't seen his birth certificate.

* Scientists say DNA shows humans used to have sex with Neanderthals. Scientists don’t call them cave men because they often lived other places. We’ve spent a lot of time looking for them in caves when they were actually living in million-dollar compounds in Pakistan.

* Monday a Delta airlines flight made an emergency landing at a wildlife refuge in Hawaii. When the lions saw the passengers they said, “Do you believe this? Delta’s actually serving food!”

* A 51-year old actor named Doug Hutchinson has married a high school student. Yesterday, Doug and 16-year old Mrs. Hutchinson announced that they were married in May. Steven Tyler is suing him for lifestyle infringement. The couple insists there’s nothing strange about their relationship, except for the fact that when he was her age, she was minus 19. Even Hugh Hefner was like, “That’s gross.”

* "Shark Week" is underway this week. Despite many years of research, marine biologists know surprisingly little about sharks. Mostly because they keep getting eaten when they try to find out.

* Somewhere James Carville is thankful that Bill Clinton didnt have a cellphone with a camera back in the 90s!!!

* It was so hot in California today that Arnold Schwarzenegger’s clothes were out on the lawn setting themselves on fire.

* It’s very hot outside, but at least all of that snow from January is finally beginning to melt.

* My 80+ year old mother and I play a new drinking game. We do a shot every time the debt talks collapse.

* A new report has found that adults in Washington, D.C. are among the top users of cocaine in the country. All this time, we thought the problem was government waste, but it’s actually that the government’s wasted.

* There is nothing wrong with making love with the light on. Just make sure the car door is closed.

* Eliot Spitzer’s show on CNN was canceled. So you wonder, how will the guy kill an hour?

* The prize money for the U.S. Open had to be borrowed from the Chinese Open....

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Treku

Kirk, Spock and McCoy
Beam down with Ensign Redshirt
Who doesnt beam up?

It's the Enterprise
Mission to start war has failed!
Now must self destruct.

Captain James T. Kirk
Hasn't got none in a week
Watch him climb the walls

Green blood, liver moved
Mr Spock's bod fascinates
K/S writers.

Now Captain Picard
Leads another staff meeting
Wake me when it's done.

It's Wesley Crusher
Star Trek's most annoying nerd
Beam him into wall.

Captain Janeway leads
But please, can't I now become
Eight of Nine? Please? Please?

Uhura, Dax and
Seven of Nine are most hot.
Short skirts! Thank you much.

Mister Data's here
Getting us caffiene to drink.
No it's Mr. Coffee!

Dax is enviable
Cuz he found himself inside
LT Jazdia.

Captain Kirk they say
Is tough, but not as tough as
Admiral Adama.....

Happy Birthday, Mr. President.

I'm not a big fan of the President, it's true. But let me congratulate him on reaching the Big Five-Oh (a number wheeling on my own horizon soon enough).

I don't agree with him much, and I don't think he's doing a great job; nevertheless, we can disagree without being disagreeable.

This from the heart: I hope and pray every day for your safety and good health. Happy birthday, sir.

The Not-So-Bright Side of the Moon?*
Maybe Not.



A fascinating study from luna-tics on the grass at the University of California Santa Cruz (home of The Banana Slugs!) suggests that our Moon got a fairly sizable ker-schmeck on its backside by a smaller moon (about 1/3 its diameter or 1/25 its volume) late in the lunar formation process.

This smaller moon (about 1/3 the diameter of the Luna we know and love) would have hit at a relatively slow speed, accounting for the highly unusual difference between the Moon we see and the Moon we don't see on the far side. (Our side has craters and maria, or "seas"; the other side has very high craggy mountains which cannot be explained by high velocity asteroid falls).

Money quote: "This scenario would also help explain why the farside's crust is so much thicker, and why certain minerals are concentrated there, the study said."

This might make it worth our while to go back--and explore the Dark Side of the Moon.

"When will we go back? And who will it be?" - Apollo 13

*With apologies to The Squirrels, Seattle's wittiest band.

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

"No capes!" - Edna Mode

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

The Squire of Gothos Has Decreed.....



I have to admit I've found the events of the last 24 hours to be rather entertaining.

First is finding that Charles Johnson of LGF--the Squire of Gothos--still remembers me after all these two and a half years--after all those other people he has defamed, trashed, slandered, libeled, banned, blocked, thrown off his site, and just plain said nasty shit about. I mean, what is it about me that EARRRRRRNED his WRAAAATH?

There are so many other targets for him to go after. Like Fjordman, for instance, the former LGF featured poster who inspired mass murder in Norway last week.

And yet he devotes excessive energy to trashing me out in spite of the fact that I have never once voluntarily posted anything to his blog under my own name. (I did blog there under a pseud, but the shithead publicly identified me years ago.) All I did, in fact, was question his decretals.

All I can ask is, what did I do to deserve the honor of all this attention?

Is it the fact that he's jealous that this blog has recently surpassed LGF in numbers of hits per day?

(Dream on, MacDuff.)

Is it the fact that my writing is so scintillatingly entertaining that he is, ahem, green with envy?

(Probably not.)

Or is it the fact that he, like the Devil, that prowde spyrite, cannot endure to be mocked?

(And BINGO was his name-oh!)

Anyway, I just wanted to thank Trelayne. Without his stupid and baseless defamation I would have not seen my blog traffic triple in the last 24 or so.

Thanks, dude. I owe you some bicycle lubricant.

(You should see to the other variety yourself.)

PS Salute and hats off to those intrepid individuals at the "Diary of Daedalus" blog for cluing me into what was going on at LGF. While I'm also not welcome there--blogmaster "Daedalus" (AKA Rodan) has reasons of his own not to be fond of me--not all that blog's posters are of the same, ahem, lack of caliber as Rodan. And them I salute. It's nice to have (some) support out there. Thanks, fellas.

Monday, August 1, 2011

Charles Johnson Sends Me Web Traffic!

Not intentionally, I'm sure. But for some reason he finds it necessary to accuse me of being the creationist twits who created a stupid video to which he links here.

I should be honored. "You remember, Captain! I cannot help but be touched." - Khan

So I sent him the following loveletter.

[Dear Charles:]

You must be running low on readers....

....to reach back into your individual Vault of Golden Garbazh (to quote the Detroit late night movie host 'The Ghoul') to go after little old me.

Of course. I had nothing to do with your stupid video. I don't have time to create bogus creationist videos; I'm too busy doing my job. You know, my job? The one you tried to get me fired from by going public with my identity?

BTW, how are your efforts of washing that red liquid from your hands? The one that Breivik/Fjordman stained you with? You may find soap don't work too well on, er, damned spots like that.

Let me conclude by waiving* my private parts at your auntie and farting in your general direction. And a prediction: one day you will defame someone who can afford more lawyers than you.

Sleep tight.

Richard L. Kent, Esq.

PS. I have reviewed the video. I am not the "Dr. Richard Kent" in the video. That guy is at least 20 years older than I am. Furthermore, I have never gone by "Dr. Richard Kent." I go by "Richard L. Kent, Esq." because there are 800 or so "Richard L. Kent"s in the United States, including one in my home town who just died last year.


Richard L. Kent, Esq.


Definitely not Richard L. Kent, Esq.

Of course, there are a lot of Charles Johnsons out there too.... if you google the phrase "'Charles Johnson' Arrested" you get 712,000 results (0.19 seconds). Go figure.

ADDENDUM 8/2/2011 3:00 PM

The Squire of Gothos posted the following pseudo-update:

UPDATE at 8/2/11 11:38:27 am
I was traveling yesterday and couldn’t update this post right away, but it turns out that the Richard Kent in this video is not the same Richard L. Kent who used to post at LGF. Amazingly, there are actually two whacked out, raging creationists with the name “Richard Kent.”

Amazingly, there are 712,000 people named Charles Johnson who have been arrested or who hang around with the arrested. You sure your middle name isn't "Wayne"?

PS. Keep scrubbing, Lady Macbeth. Keep scrubbing.

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*I was going to retype the word 'waiving' to the correct spelling of 'waving', but on second thought the mind picture of signing a waiver as to my private parts regarding his auntie is indeed a bit more amusing than the original. Lawyer humor, ar ar.